You want to get your point across, not bury it in words. Your prose should be clear and direct. If an admissions officer has to struggle to figure out what you are trying to say, you'll be in trouble.
Avoid adjectives and exclamation points. As you reread your essays, stop at every adjective and ask yourself if it is necessary. Don't even bother asking yourself about exclamation points, just leave them out!!!!!!
If your essay is filled with misspellings and grammatical errors, admissions officers will conclude not only that you don't know how to write but also that you aren't shrewd enough to get help. Ask your mom, dad, teacher, brother, sister - someone - to read your essay and comment on it. Be especially careful about punctuation.
Apart from just reading your essay, you really should have someone take a look at how your essay works with the other components of your application. Is there harmony and consistency between your essay, activities list and transcript? Have a seasoned editor or someone who's seen a lot of successful college apps, such as your high school counselor, take a look at yours.
Here are some common essay questions, followed by typical responses to them and ways to avoid getting stuck in that rut.
- Write about someone you admire. Most people write without much conviction about the president, a relative, Mother Teresa, or Martin Luther King, Jr. These people are highly admirable and heroic, but they seldom inspire interesting essays. Instead, find someone truly meaningful to you; it's even better if your choice surprises the reader.
- Write about something you have read. Many applicants think this means you have to do a book report. But that's the danger: Too many responses to this sort of question sound like book reports, and nobody likes to read book reports. Don't write about an obvious book. Your choice should make you seem interesting (though not eccentric).
- Why do you want to attend this school? Your real reason may be something better left unsaid ("Because I want to party and screw around for four years"), but the closer to the truth your answer is, the more likely you'll write something enjoyable. Avoid generalities ("to get a good liberal arts education," "to broaden my knowledge"); be as specific as possible.
- How do you see yourself ten years from now? Avoid describing your perfect job. This is a tough question, because the temptation to be boring can be overpowering. Narrow your focus. Picture yourself doing something a bit unusual, and don't strain to make a direct connection between it and a college education. Don't pretend that you think your college degree will be the sole foundation on which you build the rest of your life.
- Write about a meaningful activity. Which of your activities really was the most meaningful? Which was the most fun? Don't say that your most meaningful activity was your service on the Student Council because it taught you the importance of effective leadership. Admissions officers will see right through this. Be more creative and push yourself to really examine what experiences have been valuable to you.
